Rock lee and the Mirror
by Shishi
Haze
This is my first fic so please go
easy on me. This is just a goofy little fic I thought of when thinking about
Gai and mainly Lee.
It was a beautiful day in Konohagakure, the sun was shining,
a cool breeze was blowing and Lee was doing his normal training routine. He
was 20 now; he had made jounin at age 18 and had finally surpassed his mentor
Gai at 19.
As Lee finished his training he
decided that it was a good time to eat breakfast. That is, before he did his 2000
laps for not being able to do 1500 pushups. He traveled over to the Ichiraku Ramen
place at super speed.
When he got to Ichiraku he saw Naruto
there as usual, he also saw Hinata there but she seemed to be hiding in the
bushes with a camera. He just shrugged it off; he always thought Hinata was a
strange girl so this wasn’t very out of the ordinary.
He went up to Naruto and greeted him
with a big white, flashy smile and his thumbs up routine. Naruto was too busy
eating ramen to actually say hello to Lee so he just grunted. Lee sat down next
to the blonde haired hokage to be and ordered one miso ramen.
He explained to Naruto how he had been
training and got hungry, then came here in his usual fashion. Naruto just
nodded again. When Naruto was done he stacked his bowl atop his others and said
to Lee in a very low voice, “Lee-san I think someone is watching us, be very
quiet I’m going to ambush him!” With this Naruto went off to ambush the poor
unsuspecting Hinata.
Lee soon finished his ramen, paid the
man and went on his way. He started doing his laps but around the 1000th
lap he saw Sakura and stopped. He ran over to her and greeted her with a
cheerful “Hello Sakura-san, would you care to go out on a date with me?”
Sakura just did what she always did.
“I’m sorry lee, but I only see you as a friend. Besides have you looked in a
mirror lately?” With this she trotted off to go find Sasuke.
Lee was upset for a minute but then
got to thinking, ‘come to think of it, I haven’t looked in a mirror since I was
twelve. I just assumed I looked good because I was imitating Gai, but that was
eight years ago. I was young and foolish; full of the spirit of youth. Maybe
now would be a good time to get a mirror for my apartment.”
With this Lee went off to the mirror
shop and bought a huge mirror to hang on his wall at home. Lee kept his
excitement in until he got home. When he did, he was going to explode soon if
he didn’t see what he looked like. He quickly put the mirror up on a wall in
his room and took off the covering.
What he saw didn’t really surprise
him; he was way too upset to be shocked. After his initial day long
sobbing, it was then the time for shock. That lasted a day or so as well, but
with bathroom and food breaks. The third stage was realization: the realization
of why every single girl he asked out over the years turned him down.
Lee went through those three stages in
three days. The very first rational thought he had after he had seen
himself was to get a haircut, and then some new clothes. So that is precisely
what he did. He went down to Bob’s Barber Pole in downtown Konoha. All he told
his barber was “fix it. Just make it look… not like this, anything normal ok?”
The barber complied and promptly soaked his hair so it wasn’t in that shiny bowl
state anymore. The next thing was to dry enough so water wasn’t dripping out.
After some intense washing and drying,
the barber found out that lees hair was about shoulder length. The barber cut
it so it wasn’t so long and then made it look normal, almost like Sasuke’s but
combed down rather than sticking up. The barber gave Lee a complimentary
eyebrow plucking which took about three hours. By the time it was finished lee
looked… well he didn’t look like Lee but he still had that goofy green jumpsuit
and the yellow leggings.
He went to Slim and Tall the clothing
store that was only a few blocks away from Bob’s. Of course it only took him a
few seconds because of his super crazy speed. Lee looked around for only a few
minutes before he found some clothes. He didn’t really need to worry about cost
because he was a Jounin and all. Lee walked out of the store wearing some dark
green pants and a matching dark green tee shirt. Over the tee shirt he wore a
black jacket with the zipper open.
After the clothes were bought, Lee
went straight home to check himself out. He got to his new mirror and found
that he looked much better than before. His next train of thought was to
wonder why he ever dressed like that in the first place. His thoughts rested on
Gai who had manipulated him to make Lee think that he looked so good the way he
did. It was settled. Lee must beat the shit out of Gai before he could harm any
other innocents.
Lee found out that Gai had another
team of gennin training with him and hoped he wasn’t too late. He sped down to
the training area he used as a gennin with his super crazy fast speed to find
Gai and his students. As Lee predicted they were there training. Gai was making
them do loads of pushups and he was sitting there shining his smile. Lee ran
over to him, not before noticing that Gai hadn’t made his next clone yet. He
probably thought that one was enough because he didn’t know about Lee’s mirror,
the sick bastard.
Gai looked right at him. “Excuse me
young man but do I know you? You look almost like my Lee-san but you couldn’t
be.”
“Actually Gai-kun I am Lee and
I’ve come to stop you doing to them,” Lee gestured to Gai’s gennin “what you
did to me. Your madness must stop here Gai!”
“Oh Lee, but, but, but… what are you
talking about!? I don’t want any trouble. After all, I made you look perfect
all those years… I mean, what could be better than this?” Gai pointed to
himself and flashed a smile. “Besides Lee-san you ruined your perfect look
already, I need a new apprentice. I mean look at you.”
“Gai you’re not going to ruin another
student’s teen years. I have to stop you from doing this, you’re not stable.
Before I beat the crap out of you, I want to ask you something. Gai, how long
has it been since you looked in a mirror?” “
Um… give me a minute.” Gai walked over
to his pack and pulled out a hand mirror. He gave himself a once over, slicked
his hair with some spit and then went back to Lee. “That would be one minute
since I last looked in a mirror, Lee-san, and I still look good!” Gai flashed
another smile.
This smile wasn’t allowed to stay
there very long as Lee sped up to Gai and punched his teeth out. The precious
super white teeth that Gai prided himself on were gone and Lee, his apprentice
had done it, such a horrible deed. “I’m sorry Gai-kun I have no other choice
but to beat some sense into you.” Lee continued to beat up Gai. He made sure to
pay close attention to Gai’s hair and teeth. When Gai had enough sense beat
into him, Lee left. But not before giving some advice to his students. “Do me a
favor and do your selves a favor kids, never listen to that wack job. It messed
up my life and could mess up yours”. With that said, Lee jumped off at his
super crazy fast speed, back home for some rest and then a new day of asking
out Sakura.
When morning broke, the sun shone
brightly through Lee’s window even brighter than before. If it was even
possible, Lee was higher on life than ever before. With his new looks he
thought he had a great chance of getting together with Sakura. Lee jumped out
of bed and got in his shower. He stayed in there for about five minutes and
then got dressed. He walked out his door in high hopes that Sakura might not
turn him down.
Lee ran over to Sasuke’s house in his
super crazy fast speed. Why Sasuke’s house you ask? Well simple. Obviously
Sakura would be there ready to stalk Sasuke when he got up. As Lee planed, he
saw Sakura in front of Sasuke’s house. He ran up to her and introduced himself
“Hey Sakura-chan, it’s me Lee. How do I look? Will you go out with me now?”
Sakura turned around expecting to find
the usual Lee there, maybe with a different color jumpsuit or something, but
what she saw was the man that was to become her husband, or something along
those lines.
From now on the story goes like this,
Lee and Sakura went out for about a month. Lee decided that she was a bitch.
All the girls that liked Sasuke now liked Lee, because he had all of the same
talents, just, you know… without the whole cold hearted prick thing. Lee ended
up marrying Ayame, you know the one from the Ichiraku? He kept being a ninja
and taught many a generation to stay the hell away from Gai.
The moral of the story is: You should never imitate someone who is a complete mental whackjob like Gai-sensei, otherwise you’ll end up with a horrible life. That is, until you get a mirror.